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In Passing Her Love of Country to Granddaughter, Reader Reflects on the Meaning of Patriotism

I’m not sure why I react as I do, but when I hear our national anthem and see our Stars and Stripes raised high, I tear up. I always have; I always will.

I think of moments in the past when our flag has particularly moved me. 9/11—the first responders raising a tattered flag over the smoking remains of the Twin Towers, a flag symbolizing “United We Stand.” Or the photo of a sweet little girl poised atop her daddy’s shoulders, looking to the heavens, clutching a tiny flag in her hand. I have seen too many flag-draped caskets cradling the remains of our brave soldiers and first responders who gave their precious lives for our country. And the entire landscape at Arlington National Cemetery is draped with the red, white, and blue of our heroes who fought to protect the sovereignty of our land.

But I add to these the happy times and happy tears.

As retirees in 2000, my husband and I were hired as staff members on a Semester at Sea study-abroad program. We joined 700 college students on a four-month voyage around the world on a beautiful ship, the MV Explorer. As we set sail out of Coal Harbor in Vancouver, families and friends waved our beautiful flag from the shore in Stanley Park, bidding us farewell. I thought four months would pass before we would see Old Glory again. But I was mistaken. American flags greeted us in our first port, Kobe, Japan, as Japanese beauties waved them in welcome. And, reminding us of our influence abroad, our flags graced the entrances of the U.S. embassies we passed by during our sojourn in 13 countries. Then, months later in Havana, Cuba, our final port, I was once again moved to patriotic tears.

Thinking that a sporting event might encourage camaraderie and serve as an icebreaker between our students and theirs, Semester at Sea staff and the athletic director at the University of Havana organized a basketball game pitting our students against the university’s varsity team. When we entered the gymnasium, we found our opponent’s team in full uniform, standing in solemn attention. Suddenly, a Cuban student marched in, proudly waving our Stars and Stripes, our national anthem resounding throughout the stadium. Everyone, Cubans and Americans together, stood in quiet respect. Here I am, in the heart of communist Cuba, moved to tears by our flag and the glorious music of our country.

Years pass, and we have built a beach house adjacent to a naval base in California. Every morning at 8 a.m., our national anthem resounds over their loudspeakers. Our little granddaughter Mia visits often, and we open the patio door and call her over. Since my husband, her “Papa,” is the quintessential flag waver, we tell her that “Papa’s song” is playing, and “when we hear it, we put our hands on our hearts, we stand still, and we listen.” She follows our lead, placing her hand on her chest, standing at attention. When the anthem ends, we all clap and cheer.

Years later, on a shopping trip to our local Costco Warehouse, Mia is seated in the cart, holding the bouquet of white roses we’ve selected. We pass a display of speakers emitting a patriotic tune. It’s not our national anthem, but for her, it’s close enough. She calls out to me. “Nai Nai! Stop!” Transferring the roses to her left hand, she places her right hand on her chest. “Nai Nai! Hand!” she exclaims. “Papa’s song!” So there we stand, in the middle of a crowded aisle, hands over our hearts, as our little girl attempts to sing along to a random song with the few words of her “Papa’s song” that she remembers.

No—it wasn’t quite the same as stealth bombers flying over the Super Bowl following the playing of our national anthem. It wasn’t quite the moment in the gymnasium in Havana, Cuba. It wasn’t quite the moment of seeing Old Glory hoisted up the flagpole and hearing our country’s anthem blasting on the MV Explorer as we pulled into the Port of New Orleans that December of 2000 after our four-month voyage around the world. But it was a precious moment—one not without a tear.

Now that she’s older, my sweet Mia is beginning to understand the real meaning of “Papa’s song.” As American author Henry James said, “I think patriotism is like charity. It begins at home.” I’m confident that throughout her life, whenever Mia sings “the land of the free and the home of the brave,” she will reflect on when, how, and why she learned to stand at attention to honor our flag and our country.

From January Issue, Volume IV

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Features

Memorial Day at Mission San Juan Capistrano

Portals of the past open up to Homefront America’s Field of Honor, at Mission San Juan Capistrano.

It is only fitting that a mission founded in 1776 was chosen this past Memorial Day to honor American military members, veterans, and first responders. With nearly 400 American flags on display at Mission San Juan Capistrano in Southern California, Field of Honor was a solemn tribute expressing gratitude to the heroes who have served our country. Homefront America, an all-volunteer 501c3 military outreach and support organization, created the event as a way to celebrate America’s service members and raise awareness about the organization’s efforts in providing year-round programs to enhance the quality of life for military families.

Those who have long enjoyed such privileges as we enjoy forget in time that men have died to win them.
—Franklin D. Roosevelt

Flags are adorned with cards that remember and honor loved ones who served America; pictured is a flag celebrating all of America’s active-duty military, veterans, and first responders.

A large, beautiful courtyard at the heart of the mission was the temporary home for hundreds of flags adorned with loving messages of remembrance and gratitude from friends and family. As visitors read these heartfelt messages and stories, they are given the opportunity to see beyond the flowing rows of colored cloth, to what they truly represent—men and women who put their lives on the line in service of their country.

Mamie Maywhort, founder of Homefront America, proudly said of the event: “It’s all about the flags and the incredible stories behind the flags. Each and every one of those heroes has a significant meaning to me.” Taking in the diverse pictures and stories on each flag, we can see that a common thread of service and devotion stands guard to protect the essence of America and the principles that make the nation great.

No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks.
—St. Ambrose

Acjachemen descendant Michael Gastelum takes part in the mission’s oldest tradition, a rare ringing of the bells.

On the opening day, May 26, 2021, several veterans who had served abroad in the Korean War and Vietnam were guests of honor, celebrating this first-time event at the mission. In a rare tribute, the misson’s bells were loudly sounded to honor all of America’s service members, past and present. The ringing of the bells is the mission’s oldest tradition and has only ever been performed by a chosen few. Michael Gastelum, a descendant of Native American ancestors from the valley’s Acjachemen tribe, powerfully pulled on two ropes, reverberating the bell’s resounding music throughout the mission for over a minute.

Mission Executive Director Mechelle Lawrence-Adams poses with her father and other veterans, including Adam Maywhort of Homefront America and Michael Gastelum (center), after the ringing of the bells.

The community was invited to sponsor individual flags with donations ranging from $50 to $1,000. Mission San Juan Capistrano Executive Director Mechelle Lawrence-Adams said: “This new project and partnership strikes at the heartstrings of what makes the mission so meaningful to people of all faiths, backgrounds, and journeys. To see hundreds of American flags beautifully displayed, each representing an actual person who has served our country, should be pure awe […] the entire mission team is truly excited to celebrate our military, and can’t wait to experience the visual and emotional effect of this meaningful project.”

The first flag at the mission was installed by the Daughters of the American Revolution.

This Memorial Day saw an America deeply divided along a number of polarizing lines. The many flags that were on display offered the hope that red and blue can continue to be woven together into one American whole. The identity that transcends all colors is the unifying idea of America. As Eleanor Roosevelt said: “Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being. With freedom comes responsibility.” Memorial Day offers Americans the opportunity to honor those who took responsibility and paid the ultimate price for freedom. It is also a reminder of the responsibility all Americans share to vigilantly protect the rights and principles on which America was founded.

The historic setting of Mission San Juan Capistrano helps us look back to a time before screens and the incessant, 24-hour cable news cycle. America has always had its challenges, but it has also been home to incredible human beings willing to fight to preserve the nation’s best qualities. The flag reminds us of the blood that has been spilled in the name of “a new constellation” founded “by the people, and for the people.”

The first flag hangs on one of the mission’s 18th-century walls, near the famed bells.

True patriotism is not about blind allegiance to our leaders, but requires carefully watching them with a critical eye to discern whether or not they are serving and upholding our constitutional rights. Our heartfelt thanks go out to all those who work diligently to preserve and protect the essence of America.

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.
—Mark Twain

Jeff Perkin is a graphic artist and an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach available at WholySelf.com